Hypersexed

Anonymous asked: Recently, I've been trying to convince a female friend on the merits of masturbation, since she lacks a current partner and really enjoys orgasms. She's tried it, but rarely is able to climax. As a man, my ability to give advice is limited. So I've told her to practice 20 minutes a day for a week to see if there's any improvement. I don't want to be overbearing on this, but I think she should give it another shot. A) Do some people just not enjoy masturbation? B) Could you give her any tips?

i know you probably just want to help your friend out but it’s not your job to convince someone to masturbate. yes, some people do not masturbate/enjoy masturbation. there are a lot of reasons a person might not masturbate including some (but not all) deeply personal and/or emotional reasons. masturbation can trigger memories, thoughts, feelings, etc. and it’s possible that they can be negative for a person. also, some women learn to climax with a partner and do not know how to climax on their own. if your friend is truly looking for advice on how to climax, i would tell her to recreate in the best way she can the situation she can orgasm in during partner sex. for some this means grinding your hips and making “sex” motions. so yeah, you weren’t far off telling her to practice because that’s really the only way to find out what you like and what feels good but i definitely wouldn’t force the idea of masturbating til orgasm on her.

edit: i forgot to add that it’s also pretty common for women to feel some kind of guilt or embarrassment about masturbating. taking charge of your own pleasure feels uncomfortable or “dirty” to some, especially if you were ever shamed about your sexuality.

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